My New Obsession

I realize I'm catching on to The Mighty Boosh craze a little late, but I'm still super obsessed. How many episodes have I watched in the last 24 hours? I'm too embarrassed to say.

BIRTHDAY!

this kind of hurts a little.

Hey guess what?

I hid the musical instrument and you will never find it.

Best Week Ever.

My roommates are amazing, I say that every time, but I have never met two women more refined than Carolyn and Liz.

Reno 911! just gets better with time. Terry is the best.

I've lost close to 20 pounds.

I want to write more.

The end.


Thank you Portland for a beautiful week.

Baba O'Reilly

LIfe is so good.

Good Lord.

I'm not good at making good decisions.

Matt Wells brightened 1310 SE Clatsop for the short time he visited. It was splendid.

My roommates are the best.

Sister Wives.

I love mine.
I hate conflicting schedules.
I have never felt more beautiful than the last two days. A combination of my lovely roommates, new bras, and a certain boy who lives next door.

I'm wearing a skirt today that has not fit me in over a year. Yeah, I'm feeling good.

Grilled Cheese? Yes please.

you BETCH!

Did that really just happen?

Roman's Dead

Car has really bad ideas.

Matt Wells is going to grace my sister wives and I for what is bound to be an unforgettable Easter celebration. Dance parties, coloring eggs, passion plays. All in a weekend's work with Mr. Wells. All you other unfortunate motherfuckers who can't be there should be super jealous and try your hardest to get out here.

I'm starting to feel the longing for my friends on the East Coast. August 3-8 I will be in New Hampshire, but I don't think that I'll be able to get to Pennsylvania unfortunately. But anyone who wants to make a trek to New Hampshire on any day but the 6th when my best friends get married to each other, they can feel free.

My bed is currently broken so I had to sleep in the chair last night and Liz gets up at the asscrack of dawn for work, and I heard her get out of bed, adjust the thermostat and then I don't remember anything else. I slept through all of her morning preparations which includes making some delicious, slightly complicated breakfast (normally). I just slept right through it. Weird. I guess I'm a little over tired.

Tonight I will be doing my 2nd performance with Curious Comedy at Open Court at 8 PM. Come one and all! Everyone can play!!

I miss you all.

Sunflower Seeds

confusing. confusing. confusing.

life.

i remembered this one time when i "acted on the stage" at jesus college tonight. such a great story. i miss everyone.

Good Gravy

This week has been a bit of a downer, but the weekend has made a turn for the better.

I sold a bunch of Power Plays this week, but I'm pretty tired of pushing it on people.

I chickened out of playing at the theatre last night which I do regret, but there's always next week.

I had one of the funniest conversations about frosting and ice cream I think I have ever had.

Hopefully tonight will include good people and some pints at the Black Cat.

And maybe naptime.

FRIDAY

BAD CHOICES.

but at least i have good friends and awesome roommates.

now to cuddle with luna.

Lady Marmalade

Remember how great Moulin Rouge is? I just re-watched it for the first time in years. It was wonderful.

I perform tonight for reals for a real performance. IMPROV BITCHES. i feel better than i did when i wrote my previous entry.

Also, PAM IS HERE.

Life is good.

i don't want to do improv today.

I love my house.

LIZ YOU ARE NOW NUMBER ONE ON MY LINKS. BE HAPPY.

and thornton is a fuzzy.

the end.

I don't think that turtle looks beautiful right now

It has come to my attention that Liz has a way better job than I do. Her stories are way better.

I really want to seriously try writing things that are awesome. So I may start using this as a way to do that. But we shall see.

Yesterday I was so sick I threw up. It has literally been YEARS since I threw up (without the influence of alcohol) from being sick. It was gross. I spent all day sleeping and sipping water and by about 6 I was pretty much back to normal. I cannot even begin to say how happy I am it was only a 24 hour bug. I hate being sick, especially when the biggest symptom is nausea.

Car spends more time yelling at her turtles than she does anything else. I swear. But it's not a bad thing, I'm just saying it's the truth. Now I have to prepare myself for a physical beat down for mentioning her name in my widely read blog. If I don't update for a while, it's because she broke my fingers. One by one. Maybe roller derby IS a good idea for her.

The sun is shining. I should go for a walk.

This week so far i have...

-gone to good will and bought pants TWO SIZES SMALLER than previously owned clothing.
-walked everyday but one.
-was a part of a winning trivia team.
-had some sweet hang outs with a new friend.
-got a package from my parents filled with "i love new hampshire" treasures.
-worked quite a bit.
-got made fun of for wearing a headband everyday that i worked.
-got a game pre-order.
-went to this magical place entitled the "waffle window".
-talked to numerous friends for long periods of time on the phone.
-upgraded my phone so that i now have voicemail like a big girl.
-did i mention i'm down two sizes?

it's been a good week. now i need to practice patience, honesty, and courage. three things that i'm terrified of. oh liiiiife.

Gee I'm Glad It's Raining

Today I went for a walk outside and got caught in the rain.
It was wonderful.
Then I took a hot shower as soon as I got home.
It was magical.
Then I went to work.
It was mediocre.
Now I'm getting ready for bed.
Sleep will be delightful.

Good Day, Sunshine!

Today was a wonderful day filled with sunshine, good food, good conversation, grocery shopping, and more sunshine.

Portland is a wonderful place.

I've been having all these dreams that involve some fantastic hug along the lines of this:



Stephen Kirsch, my infamous Facebook fiance is probably in the top 5 huggers of my whole entire life. I don't get super awesome sweet hugs anymore. Every once in a while I'll get a pretty fantastic Car hug, but really, I've been missing that part of my life where I didn't go more than, say, 10 hours without some sort of human contact involving a hug or holding hands or what have you. I really miss it. And I would really like it if all of these people would come out to Portland and hug me:

Trevor Diaz
Stephen Kirsch
Abbie Getty
Sarah Burgess
DREW LANE
Bryant Vance
Richard Chagnon
Landree Fleming
Amanda Holston
Melissa Paolangoli
Stephanie Leh
Tracy Brigham
Josh Button
Jordan Swisher

Thank you all for respecting my wishes and coming to HUG ME.

I miss everyone.

Mad Chemistry

So today felt like i was back in college again.
You know, back in the day when I had 3 jobs, full course load, and various productions to work on.
Back in the day when homework was something I did at 3 in the morning.
Back in the day where most of my time was spent in the theatre or in Burgess' room or in the union.
Back in the day when I was so busy that taking a 10 minute nap felt like Jesus had come back to sing me to sleep.
Back in the day when my biggest concern was how I was going to finish my Bible project and my Theatre History project on time.

I think I have learned to do better at no doing much. I don't feel like I've wasted a day if I go on a walk or clean my room or just do something productive. I don't have to accomplish a million things a day and squeeze in a diner run in order to feel like life is slipping away.

I think it's a combination of west coast living and elizabeth powers that has helped teach me that not everyday has to be full of activity. Sometimes it's much more wondrous to slow down a little and take time for myself.

Class was awesome tonight. I felt like I really put myself out there and I took some risks and I had so much FUN. No panic attacks, no getting lost on the way to the theatre, no crying, just FUN. which is what I needed.

I'm really looking forward to the next couple days.

I Never Thought I'd Be on a Boat.

My favorites all time:




I got to play with some of the super talented curious company on Thursday night. It was my first time playing with these people that I have grown to respect and admire and it was fun. I didn't really put myself out there. I was pretty much forced out there, but I'm glad I was. I hope I can grow into becoming much more comfortable with myself that I will start to initiate scenes on my own.

Today is Valentine's Day. I see it as a day to celebrate love. Not a day to be bitter that I'm single. So happy love day my friends!

I think that's all there is to say. Let's see if I chicken out on the phone number giving tonight.

I'm on a dolphin, doing flips and shit.

Today I dropped my lovely roommate off for work at 8:30. I then spent until 11:00 driving all over the place looking for The Lonely Island CD which I finally found at Barnes & Noble for an extremely reasonable price.

Improv class continues to challenge my brain to stop thinking and just go with the flow. It's really hard to let go.


Yesterday I got lost while driving to the theatre and called my instructor and started crying. I need to work on my anxiety and panic attacks.

I need to listen to I'm On A Boat Again.

i want to go to there.

my stomach won't settle.
oh dear lord it's happening again.

my roommate is part sasquatch.

the weather has been ridiculously nice lately. today my roommates and i went on a long walk that was nice until about the last 15 minutes when i really wanted to sit down.

i have to leave for improv class in about 10 minutes. cue super anxiety stomach.

did i mention how beautiful the weather has been?

"you violated me."

Everyday is a new adventure in the carlizkatie household.

EDIT: not only was i accused of taking off liz's clothes and placing them on the couch earlier today, but car also tried to push me out of the house and then cornered me with her butt dance. EVERYDAY this happens, only in different forms. and i NEVER participate in the craziness. NEVER................

Things..

Sometimes I don't really understand people who have no ambition or drive to try and be better than they were the day before. Working somewhere like Hollywood Video and Blockbuster has given me the opportunity to meet people who live a lifestyle I have never been able to even begin to understand. One person lives in a house with about 9 other people, sleeps all day, parties every weekend, and works when he has to. That's his whole existence. He doesn't want a better job, he's never wanted to go to college, he doesn't have any clear goals he wants to accomplish before he dies, he just lives this lifestyle where he sleeps and parties. I don't understand that. Not that I necessarily have to or that I judge him for choosing to live the way he lives, but I just don't understand it. What motivates him to get out of bed in the late afternoon? I would not want to be alive.

I have a greater appreciation for my roommates every day. I love that we all come from pretty different backgrounds and have discussions about all different things. I continue to learn more and more and from them and I can feel myself beginning to change (in good ways) by trying to look through their experiences. Growing up is an interesting thing.

I need to take walks. I need to take walks. I need to take walks.

Homemade Peppermint Marshmallows.

I just got another overwhelming feeling of love and attachment to Portland. I seriously am so happy to be here and to be on my own and to be starting something that could potentially boost me to where I wanna go in life. It's crazy how I never in a million years thought that I would be in Oregon. Weird.

My improv class started on Tuesday and I'm really hopeful. There are definitely things I have to work on, but that's true for everyone. It's intimidating to be kinda just thrown into it, but really, there isn't any other way to do it. I just wish I had done better on my last scene. It would have been hilarious, but I totally bombed it. It's ok, it's bound to happen. It's a nice size class and I hope to make some friends in the process. I'm actually kinda in disbelief about the whole situation, but we'll see what happens. And my first scene got a big laugh, so there's that. :P

Other than that, my life just keeps moving forward. Work is work and it sucks, but at least I have a cool group of people to work with. That makes it much nicer. I'm trying to find more places to eat and hang out in Portland. I have eaten at Hub brewery which was delicious and they make all organic beer that is delicious, and I had a hot chocolate with a homemade pepppermint marshmallow. It was the most amazing cup of hot chocolate. Also, a little coffee shop call Lovecup makes my life a better place.




Just another reason why I love Portland so much.

Light as a feather, stiff as a board.

My new obsession is horror movies from the 90's. I never watched any when they first came out, so now I'm going through them.

Improv class starts tomorrow. Wish me luck!

This is where I live now.

I'm in love with oregon.

something

i think i spend too much of my time pretending to be places i'm not and spending time with people i'm not really spending time with. i have a sort of false reality that i use to try and boost my self esteem. but in this false reality i am not the person that i know i really am. in the false reality, i'm thin and attractive to the opposite sex. i am smooth and funny and easy to get along with. i am good at everything i try. you would have thought i would have left this behind in high school, but i have never been comfortable in my own skin. i feel like this other katie, the false katie i have dreamt up in my head, is actually the real me hiding behind the mess of who i am.

i am not an unhappy person. i try to find something positive about everyday of my life. i'm confident about where i am, who i spend my time with, and activities i participate in. but for some reason this false katie is always there to remind me that i could be so much better. and i'd like to believe that that's true.

Weird Dreams

So apparently watching Paranormal State and Pineapple Express in the same week will give you really messed up dreams.

It's been a really great couple weeks and things look like they are just going to get better. I'm so happy I'm here.

Even having a customer yell at me couldn't bring me down at work. I was just hoping he was going to get really out of hand so that I could ask him to leave. I really wanted to ask him to leave. But no such luck. He asked me to close his account and he walked out, probably calling me bad names in a another language, on the phone.

I had forgotten how awesome Freaks and Geeks was and how I am forever indebted to a Mr. Matthew Thornton for giving me the gift of Freaks and Geeks which I still have hidden away on my macbook.

My roommates are cool.

My life will never be the same again.

the map of the most incredible bookstore i have ever been inside of.

thank you portland.

Today

I feel like this is the 100% right place, I'm meant to be here, this is exactly what I should be doing with my life kind of day.

i like these kinds of days lots and lots.